[Wanbli]

Becca
as the former manager of a couple artists and bands(even ones that have played to 20K people), I can assure you - *nothing* you have said is new, nor is it anything that isn't thought or felt by all struggling artists. I am going to give you some harsh reality...sorry...

A) you don't suck and don't give up
B) you will never "get" a big break. You will need to make that happen yourself
C) you are not hustling enough. you never can be as an emerging artist. Get friends to bring friends- if someone brings 3 or 5 folks let that person in free or buy em a drink.
D) Don't try to "get signed". Major labels and signings are becoming less relevant year by year. Set up your own Web site, release your own singles, set-up your own YouTube channel
E) It is a bit of luck, a bit of talent and ALOT of WHO you know
F) Set lower success goals to start. Perhaps you can release a 5 song EP and sell 500 copies. Modest, yet reachable.
G) Think about other ways to profit/use your musician skills. TV commercials, jingles, bands for theater, plays, parties. Hell I know one AMAZING bass player, very popular in Bay Area who swears by the great $ from weddings and corporate parties.

Anyway- keep on keepin on!

[milkisobel]

don't know how it works in usa, but in my town, which is a province city but full of hipsters, some play free in very small artgallery, etc...but in this places i saw some of the most influent journalist, headhunters for underground labels etc...and petit à petit they can be programmed in more bigger venue, but underground radio, labels make good job, you have to promote as much as you can, as i do for cinema, just say few words when you see them in public parties, give promo cd or which is better the link of your website, facebook invitation, i never understand how much facebook works but it works!! this sunday i'll go to an electro concert in a garage-turn-into-theatre place, and invitation was send to 20.000persons! perhaps 200will coming! and they are not signed, no released album but a myspace and they play trough an active music association which have a lot of connection even if they don't have any money.
courage!

[milkisobel]

then, my own life sucks post:
my mother is dying for a long time now, but this time she's out of the hospital with an artificial help breather. back to home she sent to my sis and i, awful email, full of hate, resentment etc...for months now we receive such mail as "i regret to give birth to you...i hope you will end in hell...want to see your decay...you're like snakes" each one more scandalous than the previous. Yesterday a woman who helps our mother in paris (i'm 500kg far) phoned us to tell she's really bad and that we have to visit her or at least phone her.
one of my mother's friend died and she was in argue with her daughter, now my friend regret all day to not speak to her mother before she died. it was 7years ago.
but i'm so resentful, i can't imagine be in touch with her after that, things she said was too arsh, i will never say that even to my ennemy. how can i act? send her an email "hi mum, here are celia and justine your two beloved daughters, how are you, we miss you..." as i hate her so much i want her die. she bit us, she psychologicly broke us "i was so much beautiful and smart and talented as you never can be" (i was around 11 the first time she said that). she's alcoholic, she's violent, hateful, jealous, i know that she suffers a lot from her illness, probably to the fact that she have any friends and any contact with her family (no one of her sis want to speak to her anymore)

justine phone me and was in tears and she asked me "we are her daughters, how she can say that"

how can i forgive, at least, how can i speak to her again after that?
i know we have to do this not for her, but for US, but we didn't have the strongness...and i'm afraid we find this strongness too late.

[queenofnerds]

Job hunting sucks

[Becca]

Ugh, I know, I know. I know my complaints are pretty standard in this industry. I just needed to vent.
Mostly I'm frustrated with how hard it is to get people out to shows. I'm lucky if I get one friend to come out most of the time. The last show I played was opening for Eisley, and I had to sell tickets. I hustled the shit out of it, and got most of the people I know to come, but I don't feel like I can be that obnoxious about it every time. And that show was pretty much worth the agony and stress I went through for how many people were there (and bought my EPs!). But if I did that for every show I played, my friends would probably start to hate me.
I'm not sure how exactly I can hustle more without annoying the crap out of everyone. I feel like almost the only posts I make on facebook are promotional as it is....ha, that's half the reason I keep facebook.

[Ceb]

Ode, I cringed when I read that... What a vile woman... She's failed you as a mother by even having those thoughts about her own daughter.

I don't even know what to say, it's a miracle you were able to grow up in such a household... I certainly would not have the strength. And yet here you are, a bright, vibrant young woman with a real sense of love and empathy.

My only suggestion is to write to her. Let her know how you feel. Let her know what she's done. I don't even know if she'd take it to heart, though...

[cliquott]

^ +2. I felt terrible when I read this ode. i sent you a virtual hug and all my energy.

[Gerritsón]

dear ode to,


I'm really sorry to read about your mother and I have no idea what could help you. The only thing I can say is that it's pretty unfair that this shit is happening to you and that no one deserves this. I was sad to read what your mother said to you when you were only 11, it sounds like she is mentally unstable.
I'll be thinking of you and hoping the best for you these days

[milkisobel]

thank you guys, in fact, she's mentally unstable...and that's the point, cos she can't understand at least conceive what she say.
i'm so down...i try listening happy music, just saw "babies" documentary and it's worse...see all those happy babies and parents...family sucks so much i wish i was an orphan...

[Jordan~]

If she's on her deathbed, you need to be very sure about what you want to do. It's not as if you'll ever have another opportunity. It seems to me that that's no time for bad feeling.

[queenofnerds]

I'm so sorry Ode I didn't read your post till today, that is awful. I agree with Jordan, must be so hard for you though.

[Riv]

Milki, I'm so, so sorry about what you're going through! I can't imagine what that must be like for you. I hope that things somehow get better. Hugs!

[milkisobel]

it turns into really sticky shit...
she tried to phoned me 3hours later, but i didn't pick up...i feel miserable...

[ursulabear]

I am sorry about your mother too! I wish I was there to give you a hug!

[Gerritsón]

hey Ode to, this may be very hard, but what are your thoughts on what Jordan wrote?

[milkisobel]

jordan sumerize well what i have to do, of course it's too late now for resentment, but it seems it's too hard for me to act like nothing happen. My sis and i decided this evening to email her tomorow, and then, in regards to her response, we'll go through it, and perhaps go to paris.

[polliwog]

I'm almost a total blank on what to say, Celia. I've seen a number of people go through similar experiences. It's always heartwrenching. I wish I could give you a hug.

[queenofnerds]

Sad today Been reminded of something nasty.

[ursulabear]

My heart keeps racing and I have not the faintest idea of why!

[Becca]