¤ milky moon ¤ • View topic

by **Gerritsón** on 19 Jul 2010, 15:33

Hey Tom, I feel really sorry for you

by **milkisobel** on 19 Jul 2010, 20:02

seems that everyone inheritates huge weight of shit this years, hope life's sweeter for everyone...sucking life doesn't deserve so much importance.
i share the lil love i receive today

by **Cosmia** on 26 Jul 2010, 00:34

Discovered that the bag of stuff I thought was in my dad's boot isn't actually there and a whole bin liner of my possessions from uni have gone. I'm not bothered all four of my coats, not the rug, nor my turkish cushions, nor the couple of pairs of shoes, but all my various stuffed trinkets had been thrown in that bag, and I've lost the felt strange quark my boyfriend gave me and, most importantly to me, a one-eyed whistling Major Clanger. The latter was given to me by my grandfather, and him recording every single episode of the clangers for me is one of the few nice memories I have of him (you know how kiddy brains are) so however silly it sounds that I've lost my clanger, i'm really bummed about it.

And there's no way I can afford new coats. At least it's not cold. boo. ah well.

by **cliquott** on 26 Jul 2010, 19:27

my parents hate themselves. they're still married but they hate, absolutely. and i hate the screams, they're always violent and scaring. that's horrible.

by **Talula** on 26 Jul 2010, 19:50

by **ribbonbows** on 26 Jul 2010, 19:56

i'm really sorry to hear that!

the things that have been making me sad are pretty trivial compared with some of your troubles. however, i guess i'll share anyway. my friend is getting married in a month and i'm really upset about it. she's only a year older than i am and just graduated in june. so did her future husband. neither have ever really worked before. i just think it's a massive mistake. i was genuinely happy when she told me she was engaged last september, but had no idea how quickly she was planning to marry. on top of that, since high school, she became incredibly religious (in a weird way, i'm afraid to admit) and the entire wedding party is comprised of the people from the campus crusade group they're both active in. i'm the only non-religious person and just really do not fit in. i wish there was something i could say, but nothing would make a difference. i just have to accept that she'll be gone in a month.

yesterday was my birthday and i turned 20. since being home from school i've felt really lost and have missed my college life terribly. i know how sulky i've been--like a 15 year old again. i guess i feel like i should be over teenage nonsense by now, but i feel more surly than ever before.

additionally, i wanted the boy i had been dating to know my birthday. that's silly because i don't even know HIS birthday, but somehow i wanted him to randomly check his facebook and call or text me SOMETHING. ah well.

i'm pursued by someone i wish i could like but all i can do is compare him with the boy i just wrote about. he loses each time.

by **Cosmia** on 27 Jul 2010, 20:33

I can relate to the coming home and being sulky

by **queenofnerds** on 29 Jul 2010, 20:31

I think I have somewhat tired myself out. I've been working on my project from 9am till 12am 7 days a week! Need a holiday after this and I still have another 2 months of this to go. but hopefully it will be worth it.

by **ribbonbows** on 05 Aug 2010, 01:36

my granny went into cardiac arrest. she didn't have a pulse but then she started breathing again. she's ready to die though. i went and said good bye.

by **polliwog** on 05 Aug 2010, 02:07

by **Riv** on 05 Aug 2010, 02:35

by **ribbonbows** on 05 Aug 2010, 03:15

thank you. i drove around for a while after an listened to "cosmia" over and over

by **queenofnerds** on 05 Aug 2010, 15:21

Having a sad day today

had a really bad headache and came home for a bit of a cry. Hormonal much!

by **Ann** on 05 Aug 2010, 21:26

I found out this morning that my baby had died at seven weeks (I was supposed to be 12 weeks) and now for the next few days, I'm going to have to experience the miscarriage.

I feel very strange about this. Everything was fine yesterday morning, and it was literally moments before I walked into the Joanna Newsom concert that I went to the bathroom and noticed some bleeding. I've read that small amounts is generally nothing to worry about, so I wasn't panicky, but it stayed on my mind. At first it was hard to concentrate on the music because I kept thinking, "What if I lose the baby?" and worrying. I relaxed a bit but then it seemed like I kept interpreting lyrics ways I never had before to make me sad and think about losing the baby. I really didn't think I should be genuinely worried, so I wasn't running out to the hospital, but it was hard to stop thinking about. I just remember thinking, "Oh great, she's going to play Baby Birch and I'm going to bawl my eyes out." Then, of course, she played it. It sounded so much sadder than I'd ever thought it was. I remember my heart just breaking near the end. A week or so ago I was in Borders and went to the children's sections to look at books for the baby. I saw a copy of The Runaway Bunny, so I read it, thinking I wanted it for my baby. And when Joanna sang the end, "Wherever you go little runaway bunny, I will find you. And then she ran ..." I just got so sad. I just kept thinking of a mother wanting so badly to go after her baby, wherever her baby went, but not being able to because she's gone in a different way. "Be at peace, baby, and be gone." I was okay though and thought everything was fine. Joanna signed something for me that I planned to give to the baby.

I went in for an emergency ultrasound this morning when more things were going wrong and I'm so heartbroken. I just keep thinking of sitting there, interpreting lines from songs in the saddest ways, hoping that I would never ever have to feel that way. I kept rubbing my belly early early this morning, begging, "Please don't leave me, baby, please don't leave me." I'm so torn up. I know all this is so personal, but I really need to talk about it. I'm just so sad.

by **ribbonbows** on 05 Aug 2010, 21:37

i wish there was something i could say... but there are no words.

my heart broke to read this.

by **polliwog** on 05 Aug 2010, 22:08

Oh ann, I'm so sorry. Don't worry about it being "so personal". There are many of us here who really care about you. If you need to talk, then talk.

by **Riv** on 05 Aug 2010, 22:53

I am so horribly sorry, ann. I can't imagine what you're going through.

by **Weirdelves** on 06 Aug 2010, 00:16

I'm really sorry ann. I know what I'm going through isn't really comparable (extreme though it is) but I'm here if you need to talk. You're not the only one grieving and sometimes that can be a comforting thought. You know how to find me. All my love.

by **meadowlark** on 06 Aug 2010, 11:09

I'm also really sorry to hear this Ann, heartbreaking - my best wishes to you

by **queenofnerds** on 06 Aug 2010, 11:13

I am so sorry to hear that Ann.

Who is online