[Andrew]

Haaa. Thank you. I'm sorry if it was tmi or a bit dramatic but I was feeling kinda distraught. Response was very sweet

It just feels so awful. I have no real closure 'cause geographically we're so far apart. I still feel like it would be the exact same if I could see him, until I realise I can't see him. I keep recalling little fragments of our time together and I grieve for them. Also, I'm ill. Life sucks.

I'll try and curb the wallowing though

@ Weirdelves ~10 months, feels longer. Known him for years.

[Weirdelves]

ahh kinda crushing. was it always a long-distance thing or was there a moving away involved?

[Andrew]

Well, our homes are in the same town but we go to different unis. We did visit a lot though. We spent a really lovely December together.

[ursulabear]

Now I feel like a total ass for saying why my life sucks. I am sorry, Andrew. Breaking up sucks. Try to look on the bright side of things. I bet he had some annoying habits. Think about those.

My life sucks because I listened to an interview with Neil Gaiman form July. He discusses the episode of Dr Who he wrote and completely spoiled it for me! I am not at Matt Smith yet! CREYS!

[Jordan~]

Had a really stupid, totally disproportionate three-day freak out about a week ago because I had an essay to do and the deadline was approaching - it hadn't arrived yet, I just had a lot to do and it was getting nearer so I panicked and then panicked that I was panicking and just got worse until I couldn't do anything, like couldn't do anything I enjoy, never mind work, and it just got worse the closer the deadline got. So eventually the deadline came and I was just miserable for a few days, didn't get an email asking why it was late, so I just resolved to give up so I could get on with being preoccupied by mind-numbing entertainment.

Today my mum forwarded me an email from my therapist so I could send it on to Cambridge to ask for help paying for it, and I was worrying because I thought they might remember I exist if I emailed them, and just as I was fretting to a friend I get an email asking why the essay was late. At the exact moment! Gah! And it was a really short email, too, so I can't tell if she's annoyed or what. No idea what tone to write back in, or how to explain. The truth seems too dangerous - "I'm crippled with anxiety by even slight pressure; please let me come back to your extremely high-pressure university please so my life isn't ruined forever please." - and a lie seems like it'd just be flippant and inadequate (equivalent to "I'm lazy and irresponsible"), unless I invented the death of a relative or something, which I'm not going to do because being caught for that would be the worst. And how much information do I give her, and what kind? She's academic staff, do I tell her about personal problems? Should I? Is that appropriate? Do I just apologise and promise to do it asap? What if she sets another deadline really soon and the same thing happens again, if I do that? Stupid situations, leave me alone! I just want to pass under the radar for the rest of my life. Not being noticed by anyone ever would be the best. Gaaah!

[Adam]

[ursulabear]

God, Jordy. Anxiety is balls. And so many people say I 'just need to get over it.' Or that I should 'listen to some Enya and just chill'. THERE IS FUCKING SOMETHING WRONG! I am sorry, Jordy. People are total dicks when it comes to psychiatric illness. Just tell her you are having health problems.

[Steve]

I agree with Ursula here [above post, re Jordan], and I hope that as esteemed a palace of learning as Cambridge would not be so small-minded as to discriminate you because your health problem happens to involve you rmind, any more than they would exclude you because of, say, a broken leg. She's correct, too, in pointing out that so many people are prejudiced against sufferers of psychiatric illness, and for that reason those sufferers are cuased even greater anxiety, which is counter-productive. I am not going to suggest ways in which you can help, or seek help, for your state of mind, as I am sure you're already going along all those avenues, but I would suggest that an honest approach to the Uni is best: let them know what you are going through (at least as much as is necessary to explain the delayed work). That way, if the situation changes - for worse or let's hope for better - you won't be forced into a labyrinthine backtracking to explain the new state of affairs - you can just continue with the truth. Which will be less stressful.

Always remember that they would not have taken you in the first place if you weren't up to it. This is just a temporary setback that you will be able to overcome, and I sincerely hope that things begin to improve for you very soon.

[queenofnerds]

I'm all up and down at mo. Can be very happy then the slightest thing just sends me over the edge.

[Andrew]

Real baaad tonsilitis. It looks like one of the examples they use to scare people on medical shows. I'm on a 10-day course of penicillin (two tablets four times a day) and there're all these painkillers (two tablets four times per day) and throat sprays (8 per day) I'm taking on top, so I'm pretty sure I'm gonna mess up and overdose somehow. Or mess up and ruin the progress the antibiotics have made (and they don't seem to have made any). I'm so fatigued

@Jordan so agree with being open. Universities in general don't want to lose students, I'm sure Cambridge in particular would vastly prefer trying to help you over being snobbish and dismissive.

[Riv]

Aw, Andrew, that sounds awful! I hope you feel better soon.

Queenie, I'm sorry you're having a tough time!

And Alex, I'm so sorry that you're having difficulties with your university stuff. And I totally get what Ursula and Steve are saying about people treating psychiatric/anxiety problems as not 'real issues' . It can be very frustrating. I think the advice from everyone who's posted above sounds very reasonable. If you are honest about what you've been dealing with (to whatever extent you think is necessary), I would think that they would be understanding and make an accommodation for you for health reasons. I'm sure you're an awesome student, and they wouldn't want to lose you!

[ursulabear]

Today, my teacher started bitching at me because I am pro choice. Let me be a feminist, and I'll let you be not that. I don't try to shove my views on you. I am not trying to get her to stop eating meat blah blah blah.
Fuck that. She is constantly talking about her church, her pastor, her congregation. I am fine if you go to church. I am fine if jesus is your homeboy. I am NOT FINE when you constantly shove it down my throat.

And just because you (and also everybody else in the class, apparently I am the only liberal/ non Super Duper Christian) believe that life begins at conception, doesn't mean I have to.

[sadie]

[Jessie]

This was a teacher? Maybe it's because I'm in California, but that would not fly here.

[polliwog]

It happens in other places too. My daughter sends her children to a public school in Ohio where the same kind of attitude prevails from the Principal on down.

[dwaink]

the separation between church and state still exists, it gets a little fuzzy at times, but it is still there, perhaps yer teach needs a little reminding what it might be like if say...perhaps Buddhist's become the norm in America and try to shove their way of thinking down everyone at schools throats(including the teachers) ...freedom of religion includes freedom from religions tyrrany

dwain

[Jordan~]

If I were you I'd tell her off; remind her that she's there to teach, not proselytise.

[maximus]

A few years back I had a biology teacher who didn't believe in evolution, and seemed to dislike and distrust anyone who did. If any of us brought it up (which we would somtimes do to cause mischief) she would literally walk out of the classroom.
Close minded, irrational people shouldn't be teaching others how to think creatively and rationally!

[milkisobel]

if a teacher told such things in france he'll immediately suspended plus be non pro choice in france is illegal so furthermore he risk jail
and it's a really good thing, i'm glad we don't have to fight for this anymore even if each time we have a new president this law is always rediscuted, but i'm sure if someone erase this law mid part of the french population will be in the street!
i saw "jesus camp" and it freaks me out it so extreme, i don't understand why america is always the nest of such jesus freakiness

[milkisobel]

we touch minus 17 last night, for a week now it's cold as hell, it's 14°c in my appartment, but it's not the matter, a lot of homeless people are dying even if the social crew turn and turn into the city to pick up the homeless. i ask one man in my street to sleep in my house hall (i'm a little bit afraid to welcome him in house ) as it's always extremely hot in there (i open my appartment door to warm my house haha) but he won't, and he won't go to charity shelter either, he's old, i'm afraid he die, this night prevision are -19°c. there is a young girl too near my house but she has a place in a shelter, so she's ok. no one cares, each night i wander around my house to check if someone is forgotten by the social car, i can see people walk whithout a look on side of homeless. my dad lived 2years in the street and my godfather is actually in the street too, i looked for him but i guess he quit the city. we call 115 each time we met someone in pain, we have announcement in daily, radio, tv, but i ask myself if other people do.

i hate seeing poor people in my streets, i live in france, we're supposively developped, well being etc...but i see more and more poor people around me, it's disgusting, and what's the worst is the new president coming will not change a inch of that...